Unmatchable by Sky Corgan

Author:Sky Corgan [Corgan, Sky]
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3
Published: 2016-06-16T22:00:00+00:00

***

I try not to be rattled by Alex's visit, but that's far easier said than done. For the rest of the night, I cycle through moments of strength and weakness. I'm proud of myself for putting my foot down and refusing to see Nelson. But I also feel guilty for abandoning Alex without a trace. I may not regret it, but I do feel guilty about it.

He was my best friend for most of my life. My rock in a sea of constantly crashing waves. He held me when I cried. Licked my wounds and put me back on my feet whenever I'd fallen. And I had just...abandoned him without a word. Without a clue as to where I was going.

Surely, he understood. My home life was absolutely horrible. Between my drug addicted mother, my abusive father, and my gangster brother who used me, it made sense that I would take the first chance available to get out of dodge. And it would also make sense that I wouldn't want to be found.

I could have told him, though. Could have confided in him. I didn't out of fear. It was my one and only chance to escape, and I couldn't ruin it for the sake of sentimentality.

There was my chance to apologize, and I blew it. I was so caught up in thinking about my brother that I didn't even take the time to consider Alex's feelings in all of this. And he was too kind to bring it up. Or maybe he forgot. Whatever the case, it's over now. It's over, and I just want to go back to living my life.

A good night's sleep should have cleared my head, at least a little bit, but it didn't. I'm so distracted by my thoughts that I can't even concentrate on my texts with Colton. It's as if my feelings for him have been put on the backburner and new concerns and fears have taken their place. My mood is short and so are my responses.

Colton: I can't wait to see you tomorrow.

Ember: Yeah.

Colton: Do you want to come over to my place or do you want me to come over there?

Ember: I don't care.

Colton: If you come over here, I can try cooking you one of my five star dinners again. If that's not motivation, then I don't know what is.

Ember: Whatever you want to do.

Colton: That was a joke, I hope you know.

Ember: Yeah, I got it.

Colton: Is something wrong?

Ember: I'm fine.

Colton: You don't seem fine.

Ember: Can you read my mood through text now?

I look at my phone in annoyance.

Colton: No...

When he doesn't say anything else for several hours, I start to feel bad. I should not be taking out my crappy mood on him. He did nothing. Has no part in what upset me.

Before I leave work, I text him back.

Ember: I can't wait to see you tomorrow either.

Except for there was no way I could enjoy it if I was only going to be obsessing over Alex and my brother the entire time that I was with him.

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